Probably seems pretty banal but the worst thing I have done was ostracise a guy who lived across the street from me who I was friends with forever. He had just moved back into the area and was considerably richer than me and the rest of buddies which I resented. When we were about 15 he moved schools to my school and instead of supporting him in his move etc, I hung him out to dry and didnt talk to him at all. This spread to our buddies in our street too, which meant that he was left alone with no friends for ages, in what was to him a new school and new neighbours. I really regret doing this just because I was jealous of his popularity? Money? His expensive stuff? I dont know but I feel terrible that I used the leverage of my friendships with other people to make them avoid him and myself feel better. Its something that I have since tried to learn form but I wouldnt be naive enough to think that there could ever be any kind of recomciliatioon with this guy, I know he holds me at least partly responsible for some pretty unhappy times and has left the area. Is it enough to remember this incident and make sure I am nice to people from now on, it seems a glib to suggest that would be enough

I am engaged to be married to this American girl. I am a foreigner. We meet whilst she was studying in my country and we kept in touch for a year before I moved over to the US to work. Just before I moved over to the US I cheated on her with another woman. I came to the US and she forgave me. It was a very stressful time as I thought I had an Std so had to get tested but all of tests came back negative. I basically kissed her butt to be nice and swallowed all of my own feelings to make us get along. I was also in a complete funk as I was so stressed out about being in a new country, feeling guilty and worried about being sick. So I have drifted through the last few months just reacting to events and trying to make everyone happy. Now I am thinking that I only agreed to get married as I was feeling guilty for cheating on her. I have recently been diagnosed with TMJ, basically I am so stressed out I am grinding my teeth and giving my self headaches. I love my fiancee but she can be a real bitch- she has a really aggressive personality which makes me just shut down and try to block her out. She is a hopeless cook and would never dream of doing any for me. I feel like a battered husband sometimes. But I also know some of her frustration comes from my lack of communication. Recently I have tried to avoid her as much as possible but when she asks what is wrong I just clam up and say its nothing. Now all of friends and family have tickets for the wedding. If I pull out now I may lose some friends and alot of respect and money. On the other hand if I marry her I feel like I will be sacrifing my soul and living a life I don't want. I have hated America so far and long to return home. I just don't want to have any regrets or to give up any future opportunities. Any advice? Or am I just getting what I deserve?

Hello, I just want to say thanks for all of your guys help but there is one more thing. I smoke and my dad gets all pist off and he says in my house and hits me and he says go ahead and tell they won't belive you! I'm really scared. I'm trying to quit but it,s hard. Andi have a brother that is 11 and he thtinks he all big and bad. See i can fight but he a worm and he has friends help and he says all this shit and i need some help!!!!!!! Do you guys have any info. write back. - christina

This is really not a secret but more of needing some suggestions. Im married and have been from some time. I have children.Im faithful and always have been. Well to make a long story short I hate my marriage. I have stuck with it for a long time and have tired everything to keep it going. Im confused where to take it from here. I work all the time. My husband does nothing. I mean nothing. Not even house work while I work. I have tried to talk to him about all this and he will not talk to me. He tells me if this is all I want to talk about then I should just F**K myself. I have tried to go to counseling with him and that did not work either. Well today I told him to get out. Then he proceeded to tell me he was not leaving and that I got what I wanted. Basically what he meant by that was that I him dad helped me with a loan to start my busines. I pay that faithfully every month and that his parents helped us get into our home. Which I work hard to pay for every month. I didnt ask for these things but they seen that I was trying hard to make it nice for my kids and they offered. So what he meant is now that I have everything I need that I dont need him anymore. This is not the case. I do love him and try everything to keep our marriage going but Im tired of trying. I cant do it anymore. Im just not happy. I just wish that some how some way he would understand and change but I dont think it will ever happen. I just dont know what to do anymore. I guess Im scared. Not that I can not support myself and not scared of being alone so Im not sure what Im scared of. Probably just being in a situation so long Im so use to it. It is change maybe Im scared of. Im tired though of going to bed alone everynight and crying myself to sleep. I guess I just want to be love like any one should be loved. I give so much love and never receive. If anyone has gone threw this or can offer some suggestions that would be great. I would love to hear some input.

I can't work out whether I'm lucky or ungrateful. I have a 60k per year job and I drive a great car but I'm not happy in myself. I moved around a lot as a kid so I was always the new kid. My boss used to insult me but I let it go cos he was my boss. My wife loves me very much I've no doubt but she can bo SO demanding and authoritative. I just feel I never had control over my life - whether I'm at work or at home I'm always looking to keep someone else happy. I never seem to have time for ME. I've started drinking alone but I know that's not the answer. Do I cut my lossesand leave now? Am I with my wife through habit? I think I love her but would things really change if she wasn't there? So many questions, so much help I could do with...

When I was younger, my parents were friends w/ this other couple. I was friends w/ thier children so sleep-overs were a matter of fact during the summer. The husband worked nights so he wasn't there. I used to sneak into the wifes bedroom after everybody was asleep and try to get a look at her sleeping, cop a feel... I was sucessful in geting my hand in her shorts and feeling her ass a couple of times and lifting her shirt and seeing/ touching her breasts once. I also watched her undress at family camp when she thought I was sleeping.

My girlfriend is pregnant. I don't know what to do. When we first found out, the plan we came up with was for her to have an abortion. So we made an appointment with a clinic. I paid for everything. But before the operation took place, she tells me that she can't go through with it. I was somewhat upset, but I understood. A few weeks passed and the idea of having a child grew on me. I was actually pretty happy. So I told her to talk to her parents, which she did. At first when she told them they seemed very understanding. But after like a week their postion on the mater totally changed. They told her that, I wasn't going to be there for her. That I was just an irresponsible kid. And that she should have an abortion. Now I have this little part of me saying, "maybe she should". And it's beginning to grow on me. I mean at one point I really thought I was in love with her, but now I'm not sure. Plus now it seems like I'm trapped. I mean I can't just leave her alone to raise our child, it wouldn't be right. In a week, I'm flying back home from school. I told her that I wanted to tell my parents in person, and that moment is approaching. I don't know what I'm going to say. To be honest I'm scarred. Please God see me through this I need help...

I have this huge crush on this amazingly cute girl who always talks to me about her ex. Is this a sign? Please help!