I Decided I want to be skinny...like extremely skinny. I've been looking at skeletal models and they look amazing, I can't help but imagine how I would look if I lost so much disgusting fat off me. But my family is getting suspicious of me, I wasn't good at hiding me skipping breakfast and lunch. They even told me to swear I ate. So I decided to plate my food and throw it away when they were not looking. My mother made pancakes for breakfast this morning, she told me to eat. Which I "did" took them to the Livin room with my tea and pretended to chew. And then when no on was looking threw it in the trash as well as pour the tea back. I know what they want. They want me to stay ugly and fat. I want to be happy and beautiful. And no amount of "your beautiful" will stop me. I don't care about myself or what happens to me, I just want to be skinny then I'll be happy. Because I'm sick of not being able to look at myself without me wanting to break the mirror. I can do it. And I will.